For those unlike me its easy enough to say, "No, not for me!" "No more." They seem to so easily chalk out a realm for themselves, restrict themselves to it and don't care to venture out of it. This ability is awesome! How do they do that?
One of the many heads of my monster wants, wants, wants. No not things! Want to do, would like to, is interested in.....the list seems endless. For me, and those like me, our interests are many and varied. How does one restrict oneself?
But wait! I can do it! I have done it! I have said NO! No more books from the library until....and I set myself a goal. That done, I can reward myself. I also curbed my desire to sew clothes for myself until two weeks ago. Before that I would occasionally browse in the remnant section and bring home pieces and turn them into tops, nighties, pillow covers, vests. There's nothing wrong with that, you say. But I would get so driven, my housework would remain undone, my sink would be full of dishes and I would be sewing. Now I have these sewing splurges when my husband is away on a trip. That way he doesn't have to deal with my sewing paraphernalia. Even if I get too driven (and get carried away) I can always quickly catch up with the housework before he is back. Thus I, too, force myself to set limits. I force myself to be normal like other people. I allow myself to be myself every now and then. But mostly, these days I subject myself to cognitive behavior modification. Believe me, it's hard work. But it can be done!
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Focus, focus......
As for the many-headed beast in me, one of its heads can hyperfocus. It is suggested that we consider this our strength and reap its rewards. It definitely makes multi-tasking a cinch for us. And where would one be without this ability in today's world of PDA's, iPhones, IMs etc.
Here one needs to draw a balance. The 2006 batch of freshmen at John's Hopkins University were found to be very proficient at multi-tasking but a large number of them were dreadfully unequipped to prioritize and manage their time efficiently.
When we multi-task our attention and comprehension is obviously divided and unequal to undivided attention. I invariably play games on my laptop while watching TV. Needless to say my attention toggles between the laptop and the TV. If the latest CSI or Mystery episode proves to be more gripping than usual, my game score starts plummetting. Well, elementary, my dear Watson, you say. Yes! and this has been proved in clinical studies as well.
However, it does have its own benefits. I can spend time obstensibly with others watching TV but I can also be IMing others half a continent away. Besides it helps me tolerate the boring shows that others opt for. It helps me compromise and win some brownie points AND (just between you and me) hang on, tooth and nail,to some vestige of my sanity.
Here one needs to draw a balance. The 2006 batch of freshmen at John's Hopkins University were found to be very proficient at multi-tasking but a large number of them were dreadfully unequipped to prioritize and manage their time efficiently.
When we multi-task our attention and comprehension is obviously divided and unequal to undivided attention. I invariably play games on my laptop while watching TV. Needless to say my attention toggles between the laptop and the TV. If the latest CSI or Mystery episode proves to be more gripping than usual, my game score starts plummetting. Well, elementary, my dear Watson, you say. Yes! and this has been proved in clinical studies as well.
However, it does have its own benefits. I can spend time obstensibly with others watching TV but I can also be IMing others half a continent away. Besides it helps me tolerate the boring shows that others opt for. It helps me compromise and win some brownie points AND (just between you and me) hang on, tooth and nail,to some vestige of my sanity.
Not now......
There's a beast in me that I grapple with everyday. Its a many-headed monster. So maybe I can tackle it one head at a time.
Procrastination! there I've said it and maybe this will make my battle easier.Oh, yes! you've come across the garden variety procrastination. Not paying bills to the very last minute; not replying to emails, snail mail; clearing out the garage. Everyone is guilty of one or more of these. But for some like me its a gargantuan task.
"Put away each thing once you're done with it," suggests my mother tactfully. Yes! makes a lot of sense. Logical, even. I can do logic. But the monster within me has a very low threshold of tolerance for the merely mundane, routine, ho-hum, repetitive, everyday acts of life. Things have to excite me, challenge me.
I'm something of a risk taker.
My mother will cheerfully wake up every morning: have her shower, go for a walk, have her breakfast, cook an elaborate meal for the day, clean up thoroughly after herself and then, and only then will she reward herself every week day with her "soaps" from 12:30 to 3 PM. That done, she's ready for whatever may come along. That was the example she set me as I grew up. Obviously, it didn't take. I have two sisters who follow that model. Where did I go wrong?
For me it's a battle and I recognize that. I can do it. I have done it (many times) like a smoker quitting his habit! But ces la vie........at least for me!
Procrastination! there I've said it and maybe this will make my battle easier.Oh, yes! you've come across the garden variety procrastination. Not paying bills to the very last minute; not replying to emails, snail mail; clearing out the garage. Everyone is guilty of one or more of these. But for some like me its a gargantuan task.
"Put away each thing once you're done with it," suggests my mother tactfully. Yes! makes a lot of sense. Logical, even. I can do logic. But the monster within me has a very low threshold of tolerance for the merely mundane, routine, ho-hum, repetitive, everyday acts of life. Things have to excite me, challenge me.
I'm something of a risk taker.My mother will cheerfully wake up every morning: have her shower, go for a walk, have her breakfast, cook an elaborate meal for the day, clean up thoroughly after herself and then, and only then will she reward herself every week day with her "soaps" from 12:30 to 3 PM. That done, she's ready for whatever may come along. That was the example she set me as I grew up. Obviously, it didn't take. I have two sisters who follow that model. Where did I go wrong?
For me it's a battle and I recognize that. I can do it. I have done it (many times) like a smoker quitting his habit! But ces la vie........at least for me!
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